Search found 59 matches

by Yankee in Oz
Sat Aug 01, 2020 5:30 am
Forum: Jokes
Topic: The Moral of the Story
Replies: 1
Views: 2684

The Moral of the Story

The teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment: Get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it. ---The next day, the kids came back and, one by one, began to tell their stories. There were all the regular types of stuff: Spilled milk and pennies saved. But then the teache...
by Yankee in Oz
Fri Jul 17, 2020 1:06 am
Forum: Jokes
Topic: A beer swilling Chinaman
Replies: 1
Views: 2614

A beer swilling Chinaman

I was standing at the bar yesterday and this little Chinese guy comes in, stands next to me and starts drinking a beer. I said to him, "Do you know any of those martial arts things, like Kung-Fu, Karate or Ju-Jitsu?" He says "No, why the fluck you ask me dat, is it coz I Chinee"?...
by Yankee in Oz
Sun Jun 07, 2020 12:26 am
Forum: Jokes
Topic: An Inventive Sunday Service
Replies: 1
Views: 2528

An Inventive Sunday Service

A minister decided that a visual demonstration would add emphasis to his Sunday sermon. Four worms were placed into four separate jars. The first worm was put into a container of alcohol. The second worm was put into a container of cigarette smoke. The third worm was put into a container of chocolat...
by Yankee in Oz
Sun Jun 07, 2020 12:20 am
Forum: Jokes
Topic: Sex on Sunday
Replies: 1
Views: 2634

Sex on Sunday

A man wonders if having sex on the Sabbath is a sin because he is not sure if sex is work or play, so he goes to a priest and asks for his opinion on this question. After consulting the Bible, the priest says, "My son, after an exhaustive search, I am positive that sex is work and is therefore ...
by Yankee in Oz
Sat May 23, 2020 10:40 pm
Forum: Jokes
Topic: The recruit's letter home
Replies: 2
Views: 3206

The recruit's letter home

Dear Mom & Dad, I am very well, I hope you are too. Tell big brothers Sean, Paddy and Mick that the Army is better than working on the farm; tell them to get into the Army quick before the jobs are all gone. I was a bit slow settling down at first because you don't get out of bed until 6am, but ...
by Yankee in Oz
Thu May 14, 2020 6:40 am
Forum: Jokes
Topic: The Italan Newlywed and Her Mama
Replies: 0
Views: 2219

The Italan Newlywed and Her Mama

Maria had just got married, and being a traditional Italian she was still a virgin. On her wedding night, staying at her mother's house, she was very nervous. Her mother reassured her; 'Don't worry, Maria, Tony's a good man. Go upstairs and he'll take care of you, meanwhile, I'll be making pasta.' S...
by Yankee in Oz
Mon May 11, 2020 11:35 pm
Forum: Jokes
Topic: A lasting cure?
Replies: 0
Views: 2275

A lasting cure?

Brenda and Steve took their six-year-old son to the doctor. With some hesitation, they explained that although their little angel appeared to be in good health, they were concerned about his rather small penis. After examining the child, the doctor confidently declared, 'Just feed him pancakes. That...
by Yankee in Oz
Mon May 11, 2020 1:37 am
Forum: Jokes
Topic: The when and how of learning to cuss
Replies: 0
Views: 2182

The when and how of learning to cuss

A 6 year old and a 4 year old are raking the yard. The 6 year old asks, "You know what? I think it's about time we started learning to cuss."The 4 year old nods his head in approval. The 6 year old continues,"When we go in for breakfast, I'm gonna say something with hell and you say s...
by Yankee in Oz
Sat May 09, 2020 9:18 am
Forum: Jokes
Topic: WHERE DO RED-HEADED BABIES COME FROM?
Replies: 0
Views: 2187

WHERE DO RED-HEADED BABIES COME FROM?

After their baby was born, the panicked father went to see the Obstetrician. 'Doctor,' the man said, 'I don't mind telling you, but I'm a little ... upset because my daughter has red hair. She can't possibly be mine!!' 'Nonsense,' the doctor said'. 'Even! though you and your wife both have black hai...
by Yankee in Oz
Sat May 09, 2020 1:05 am
Forum: Jokes
Topic: Only in Australia
Replies: 3
Views: 4075

Only in Australia

A truckie walks into an outback cafe with a full-grown emu behind him. The waitress asks them for their orders. The truckie says, 'A hamburger, chips and a coke,' and turns to the emu, 'What's yours?' - 'Sounds great, the same,' says the emu. A short time later the waitress returns with the order 'T...